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Mauston, Wisconsin Really Harshes Gamers Attempts to Woo Girlfriend

It's a tale as old as time. One person finds another person attractive, and the dance ensues. Trying to find the right dance can be difficult, for everyone is different, with different tastes and different likes, loves, and concerns.

But one thing is certain if a dough-head is trying to woo, the idea is sure to be doo-doo.

He wasn't heading to Rochester, MN, but I figured what the heck, it'll give us all a little perspective. (Google)
He wasn't heading to Rochester, MN, but I figured what the heck, it'll give us all a little perspective. (Google)
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A 22-year-old Chicago man was trying to impress a woman (his words) by driving as they do in the popular video game, "Grand Theft Auto."

Did it work? Did She Catch His Pitched Woo?

It would seem not.

Breaking down the criminal complaint into a short version. On September 5, 2021...at about 9:30 PM...

Deputy (Deputy A) advised dispatch of vehicle heading North on Hiway 58 coming from Mauston. It passed him going 80 mph. The vehicle accelerated out of sight (we'll call the speeder DH...for Dough Head).

Another deputy (Deputy B) spotted the DH, tried to catch up and, another Deputy (Deputy C) was alerted to be on the lookout for DH.

Deputy C turned onto a highway and screeched to a halt because DH almost crashed into Deputy C and then DH took to the highway ditch and then back on the road.

Car accident
This upside-Down Car is NOT the car in the story, but just to give you an idea of what upside-down cars can look like. Because...you know, maybe you don't know. (medtide)
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Deputy C began the pursuit, eventually hitting 122 mph, but the DH was going faster still. They cut the pursuit.

Deputy D (no, we haven't met Deputy D yet, he's new to the story) saw the DH and probably said something like, "Hey, I think the DH just passed me and crashed."

Deputy C arrived on the scene, DH had overturned, but, miraculously, didn't look injured and didn't complain of injuries.

Deputy C found no driver's license but did find a Social Security card and a speeding ticket from earlier in the day. ((SHOCK SURPRISE!))

Ten Sided Barn near Mauston, Wisconsin - Credit: Royalbroil on en.wikipedia, CC BY-SA 2.5, via Wikimedia Commons
Ten Sided Barn near Mauston, Wisconsin - Credit: Royalbroil on en.wikipedia, CC BY-SA 2.5, via Wikimedia Commons
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According to the Kenosha News, the Dough Head...

...was charged with felony second-degree recklessly endangering safety and felony attempting to flee or elude an officer. If convicted he faces up to 10 years in prison or a fine of up to $25,000, or both, for the endangering safety charge and up to 3 1/2 years in prison or a fine of up to $10,000, or both, for the fleeing or eluding an officer charge.

As always, if you have a comment, complaint, or concern about something I wrote here, please let me know: james.rabe@townsquaremedia.com

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